It can be so hard to accept help. Especially, for strong, Christian women who know God is with them. We can do all things through Christ, we don’t need you. Thank you. But friends, there’s a lesson to be learned about the ways of pride. You see, pride is sneaky. It disguises itself as independence, a positive, good thing. Yet, is independence really God’s way?
I often speak out about pride because it is within its nature to make us believe we are self-righteous, humble and lowly, all the while deceiving us. Pride says:
“I am humble.”
“Don’t worry, I can do it.”
“I’m called to do other things, not that kind of work.”
“I deserve it.”
“I have a right to hold this grudge.”
“I am strong enough.”
“Nobody can do it better than I can.”
“I don’t need to ask for help.”
“I don’t need to go to church.”
“God would never do that to me, I’m too special.”
“I only need God, not people.”
You were not made to be an island. You were not created to be alone or independent. You not only need God, but others, and friend, it takes humility to admit it and receive it.
It’s God’s desire that we remain dependant on Him, putting aside our pride and self-righteousness, our strength and our spiritual maturity, and let Him lead us; admitting before Him and man we are in need of help. Yet, I have seen us cry out to God, then a helping hand comes and we say: “Oh no, thank you. I’m okay. I don’t need anything” We look for a sign from heaven, when often, God answers our prayers through the people right in front of us.
Some say, “It’s because I’m a Giver! That’s why it’s hard for me to receive!” Rightly so, since I believe, especially for followers of Christ, it’s easier to give than receive. Still, how can there be givers without receivers? Though it is more blessed to give than to receive (Acts 20:35), there is certain humility to confess: I am in need of what you give.
Recently, I was sick with bronchitis. Many people came to me, asking to help, and at first, I didn’t let them. “I’m fine,” I said, “I have everything I need, it’s all good. Don’t worry, I can manage.” I didn’t want anyone to make a fuss over me. God is with me. I’m fine. Really. Then I ran out of honey, as it began to rain, and as weakness overtook my sick body. To this, I could only say, “Okay, God! I get it. I need help. Now, what?” Just three words: Ask for honey. A few hours later, my landlord asked if she could help me in any way or if I needed anything, and I said, with some hesitation, “Um. Would you mind terribly picking me up some honey?” Oh, such relief on her face that I asked! “Of course! Anything! Please let me help you.”
Sometimes, it’s not about a physical object, but rather allowing others to support us emotionally. Either way, a note to those who are Givers: one of the greatest gifts you can give to others is to receive from them. For if we receive what they give, then God will bless them for giving. That’s our gift to them.
“Give, and it will be given to you. Good measure, pressed down, shaken together, running over, will be put into your lap. For with the measure you use it will be measured back to you.” – Luke 6:38
On another note, I’ve seen pride make us feel entitled, as though we deserve what others give to us. Perhaps, this is what we fear, becoming prideful in this way so we refuse help altogether. Though, if you find yourself in doubt, know the difference between the two is this:
Pride fills you with attitude.
Humility fills you with gratitude.
In saying all of that, above all things, be obedient to God first, always. We are to be wise, listening to Holy Spirit when we give or receive. Never assume because it seems like the right thing to do, you ought to do it. Jesus, our Lord, only did what He saw the Father do, and likewise, if we indeed desire to follow Him, must learn to do the same.
Princesses, I come to you saying these words because I am learning them myself. Here I am, friends, struggling with pride and yet, understanding Jesus is such a patient teacher. He knows me and He knows you. We are in this together! Jesus is here to help you to lay your life down and take His ways upon your shoulders. Come to Him without fear or shame. Remember, in Him there is grace, there is love but surely, there is the truth. May His truth shine in your life and bring to light all that tries to hide, so you may walk fearlessly, humbly, strengthened by the love of God for you, and full of hope for you and others.
“For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but one who in every respect has been tempted as we are, yet without sin. Let us then with confidence draw near to the throne of grace, that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need.” – Hebrews 4:15-16
In summary, do not let pride overcome your life, but overcome pride with humility. Give when the Lord tells you to give, but remember to receive when He tells you to receive. Let yourself be loved by others, as you go and love them. Think of yourself no higher than you ought to, rather come before the Lord in your honest weakness, that He may bless your life.
With all my love,